Growing up in England, with our "stiff upper lip" culture, we often heard this English children's rhyme: "Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words shall never hurt me." This rhyme first appeared in the mid-nineteenth century to defend against bullying and verbal name-calling. It was deliberately constructed to build resilience, prevent physical retaliation, encourage indifference, and cultivate calmness—in other words, don't make a fuss and carry on. Quite the mission, it would seem, for such a seemingly simple sentence.

Navigating the rough and tumble of the school playground, I remember being skeptical, even as a young child, about whether it was true. Not only did children call each other names, but some of our teachers did, too. When math isn't your strong suit, and your teacher refers to you as "fish n chips" (to rhyme with Phipps!) as he picks you out to answer a question about the mystifying topic of simultaneous equations, cultivating calmness is the last thing on your mind. To this day, when people start talking numbers, my palms get sweaty.

When we consider the power of words, we only need to look at how words shape and influence history for better and worse. The Reverend Martin Luther King, Jr., "I have a dream…" President George W. Bush, "…the people who knocked these buildings down will hear all of us soon". John Lennon, "…give peace a chance". Words can connect, divide, inflame, inspire, damage, and heal, as we know only too well from today's political scene.

No wonder when Johannes Gutenberg invented the movable-type printing press around 1440, it became the core technology that gave rise to the Age of Enlightenment. The printing press enabled the mass sharing of ideas and information, a key milestone in the history of human communication. Until then, the church mainly disseminated information, which played a dominant role in shaping society by keeping the status quo and retaining power. They who control the words dominate the narrative with the power to influence and preside over the trajectory of our human story. The same playbook plays out today in the fight over book banning, free speech, and internet control.

Not only do words have enormous societal power, but they also shape our private lives. We all remember some particularly hurtful things someone has said. Indeed, we are more likely to remember the painful than the loving and uplifting. In my coaching practice, I help many people scarred by words they find nearly impossible to move on from, never mind forget. And, of course, this has a flip side. We, too, will have used words, particularly in the heat of the moment, that have wounded and had consequences for others far beyond anything we could have imagined.

Spoken words can be particularly potent and long-lasting. There's no eraser or delete button for spoken words. Even when we apologize if we've been hurtful, the words remain no matter what we do. We can never unsay what we have said, and it doesn't matter whether we set out to be deliberately hurtful or have caused accidental hurt.

Words can't break our bones or wound our flesh in and of themselves, but here's the bottom line: they have an energy and a force capable of causing multiple harm. Words can be used to humiliate, humble, hinder, and mislead. In the words of the British Politician from 1930, Pearl Strachan Hurd, "Handle them carefully, for words have more power than atom bombs."

We all have a duty to choose our words carefully, whether writing or speaking. Always consider how these words could land on the other side. Particularly important is to do your best to dial down the rhetoric when angry or upset. If necessary, give yourself what I call "an elegant opt-out" by leaving the situation and returning to it when you feel calmer. Walk around the block, lock yourself away, and scream your head off if necessary. Powerful emotions can be significantly calmed, but only when released. It's when we keep the lid on them that, at some point, the pot will boil over, and we use words that wound, inflame, and provoke, particularly when we exaggerate. And remember the flip side – your words also have the power to create harmony, hope, healing, and happiness. So, mind what you say; it matters to you, those around you, and our world.